Steffany!!! I am sure this was so hard to write and also maybe cathartic? It's heartbreaking to read but also one of your best stories that I've read. So honest, real, and gut wrenching. I can relate although you were much nicer with your dad and gave him many chances. There is really no way you could have tried harder, in my opinion. He was going to destroy himself with alcohol regardless of anything you did. You are an amazing person and I am proud of you, too. It takes a lot of guts to share this. You had to grow up so fast and of course things like this stick around and stay with you. It reminded me that I still need to read that adult children of alcoholics book. Hugs!!