This is a tough one! She still has her mind so she can't really be forced to do what she doesn't want to unless her daughter would go on to say she is a danger to herself. So sad that the relationship is going the way it is between them. I am sure after the daughter helped that much she just had enough but I hope she comes around. I don't think you enabled. You were just helping her out, I am sure she would have found a way because of how stubborn she is. My grandma was this way and no one could force her out of her home that she stayed in until the last few months of her life, when she was 95.