Wow, B... you know this hit me in such a deep way. I applaud you for telling your story and opening up here. I love when you do. Regardless if it's unfair to her, it is what happened to you and how that made you feel. By writing about it, going to therapy, and doing the inner work to truly heal, then you can feel lighter. I felt that way about my mom, too, like somehow I was trying to protect her for so long but after my final straw, that no longer worries me. ((((((hugs))))))