You are doing a damn good job of working through all of this. Seriously, you are so aware and I'm really impressed by you. Ah, the ability to mold someone and make them love you. I never thought of it that way but I think I am a little guilty of being like this when my kids were young and when I had to give up control it was hard for me, but also good.

Have you said what her words were when you said you were having a boy? My memory is foggy but I am thinking maybe you did.

And ugh, growing up like you have to do everything right is so freaking exhausting, right?

The walking on pins and needles, too. It's as if you were the adult during the whole relationship and she was your child. That'll make you grow up way too fast. I seriously wish she would read all of this and wake the F up! She has an amazing daughter and she probably hasn't changed much at all. Did she ever read that book?